Bear with me - this is going to be a little long. It's regarding an incident that happened on Monday and another one on Tuesday and the outcome that occurred today. See, it can get a little long.
I just received this email from Macy's teacher. Macy told me about the incident yesterday - but we were at dinner celebrating Elle's birthday and something interrupted the discussion so we never got very far.
Two notes - 1. this is a little boy that we know and we know his parents. His older brother is Jack's friend and was taken out of school and is now home-schooled because he was behaving poorly in school. The younger brother is and has been Macy's friend. He "loves" Macy and she said he always tells her so - wants to marry her, etc. His dad even told Don recently as a local get together how C has stars in his eyes when he speaks about Macy.
And 2 - our school is an IB school. They give out IB attitude awards such as compassion, empathy, enthusiasm, etc. That's what they are talking about with the Tolerance award.
Here is the email from the teacher.....
I just wanted to let you know that Macy go an IB sticker for tolerance today! Yesterday, while we were sitting at the writing center, a boy lifted up her skirt. He apologized. Today, I noticed she and that same boy at the far end of the field talking, so I asked them what they were talking about and Macy told me that he said that her brother and sister were not smart. We went through the process of apologizing and also Macy told him that it hurt her feelings. I wanted to let you know because it seems like a recurring event and I do not want it to escalate. I will do my best to ensure that Macy is in the best hands here at school. Please let me know if you have any questions.
Two notes - 1. this is a little boy that we know and we know his parents. His older brother is Jack's friend and was taken out of school and is now home-schooled because he was behaving poorly in school. The younger brother is and has been Macy's friend. He "loves" Macy and she said he always tells her so - wants to marry her, etc. His dad even told Don recently as a local get together how C has stars in his eyes when he speaks about Macy.
And 2 - our school is an IB school. They give out IB attitude awards such as compassion, empathy, enthusiasm, etc. That's what they are talking about with the Tolerance award.
Here is the email from the teacher.....
I just wanted to let you know that Macy go an IB sticker for tolerance today! Yesterday, while we were sitting at the writing center, a boy lifted up her skirt. He apologized. Today, I noticed she and that same boy at the far end of the field talking, so I asked them what they were talking about and Macy told me that he said that her brother and sister were not smart. We went through the process of apologizing and also Macy told him that it hurt her feelings. I wanted to let you know because it seems like a recurring event and I do not want it to escalate. I will do my best to ensure that Macy is in the best hands here at school. Please let me know if you have any questions.
Ok - the kids just got home from school. I was told more of the story by Macy and by Jack. Macy told me that C was following her on the playground today and she asked him to stop. He asked why and she said because it's annoying. He told her "you're annoying, wait, your brother is annoying." Macy told him "no, he's not." and C said "yes, he is and he's not even smart." He went on and told her that when Elle grows up she will be an annoying adult and Macy replied "no, she will be a loving and caring mother." 
So sweet! She said he told her Jack will be annoying too and she said "no, he will be a loving and caring father and he is smart enough to be a scientist." 
Love how she stuck up for her brother and sister.
I just wrote another reply to the teacher and copied the principal and asst. principal, as well - since the other incident I mention in the letter happened outside of the teacher's classroom and involved Jack. Here is my email...
Hi All,
Macy just came home and explained this incident to me. As I told Mrs. D, Don and I aren’t overly concerned about this incident and know that young children do these things and they are usually innocent. Also, as a parent of a boy who sometimes did stuff like this – we know what it’s like to have someone jump to conclusions and blow things out of proportion.
Having said all of that, the reason I’m copying all of you in this email is because this extends outside of Mrs. D’s classroom. Jack told me that this morning he saw C and asked him why he pulled his sister’s skirt up. He said C didn’t answer him but just “stared at me real mean” and then started punching Jack and then kicked him in his “private parts.” Jack said he just stood there blocking his punches and telling him to stop. Jack said he then told Mrs. H (the school counselor) who talked to C and made him apologize to Jack and then they all went on their way to class.
I appreciate the apology and do not want to blow things out of proportion, but I am concerned that this is escalating. It seems the incident this morning didn’t stop because then C took it out on Macy today saying mean things to her about her brother and sister. He told her that her brother is “annoying and will grow up to be an annoying adult” among other things.
I know the W's (C's parents) and can speak with them directly, if necessary, however, I would like to know how this is being handled at school. These kids all ride the bus together and I don’t want things to get out of hand. I have spoken with my kids and expect them to behave in a responsible manner, but I also don’t want them to just be picked on and bullied, for lack of a better word. Elle said that the kid that sits with C on the bus kicked her today. I don’t know if it’s all related or not, but I would like to get this straightened out before it goes any further.
Please let me know how this is being handled at school. I look forward to hearing from you.
So sweet! She said he told her Jack will be annoying too and she said "no, he will be a loving and caring father and he is smart enough to be a scientist." Love how she stuck up for her brother and sister.I just wrote another reply to the teacher and copied the principal and asst. principal, as well - since the other incident I mention in the letter happened outside of the teacher's classroom and involved Jack. Here is my email...
Hi All,
Macy just came home and explained this incident to me. As I told Mrs. D, Don and I aren’t overly concerned about this incident and know that young children do these things and they are usually innocent. Also, as a parent of a boy who sometimes did stuff like this – we know what it’s like to have someone jump to conclusions and blow things out of proportion.
Having said all of that, the reason I’m copying all of you in this email is because this extends outside of Mrs. D’s classroom. Jack told me that this morning he saw C and asked him why he pulled his sister’s skirt up. He said C didn’t answer him but just “stared at me real mean” and then started punching Jack and then kicked him in his “private parts.” Jack said he just stood there blocking his punches and telling him to stop. Jack said he then told Mrs. H (the school counselor) who talked to C and made him apologize to Jack and then they all went on their way to class.
I appreciate the apology and do not want to blow things out of proportion, but I am concerned that this is escalating. It seems the incident this morning didn’t stop because then C took it out on Macy today saying mean things to her about her brother and sister. He told her that her brother is “annoying and will grow up to be an annoying adult” among other things.
I know the W's (C's parents) and can speak with them directly, if necessary, however, I would like to know how this is being handled at school. These kids all ride the bus together and I don’t want things to get out of hand. I have spoken with my kids and expect them to behave in a responsible manner, but I also don’t want them to just be picked on and bullied, for lack of a better word. Elle said that the kid that sits with C on the bus kicked her today. I don’t know if it’s all related or not, but I would like to get this straightened out before it goes any further.
Please let me know how this is being handled at school. I look forward to hearing from you.
This is from today:
I just got a call from our AP. Let me start by saying that we have a new AP this year. 
Most of you know that I didn't really "care" for our previous AP and while she and I were friendly with each other - we kind of butted heads on some things. Remember when she accused Jack of lying and I proved that he was telling the truth and then made her apologize to him? Yeah - that started our rift and well, it really never went away.
So, imagine my surprise when school starts this year and I see she is no longer at our school. (She moved back to Chicago where she was from to be closer to family.) Anyway, we got a new AP who is a male and until today has only said two words to me. He seems friendly but very quiet.
After the incident yesterday, I emailed the Principal, the new AP and the teacher. I posted the email that I sent yesterday. Well, this morning the Principal emailed me first thing saying that the AP would be speaking with all children involved and appropriate action would be taken.
So I get a call a few minutes ago from the AP, Mr. W. He said he received my email and called Macy into his office this morning to tell her story. He said that she didn't tell him anything that she hadn't already told me. He said she didn't mention the pulling up the skirt part and he didn't want to press her on that issue in case it made her uncomfortable but he already knew about it from the teacher and me. She just told him about C calling her brother and sister names. She told him that he has always liked her and used to hug and kiss her in Kindergarten but he doesn't do that anymore.
Then he called in C and let him tell his side of the story. He confirmed everything Macy had already told him.
Then he called Jack in to tell his side of the story. The AP told me "I know you don't know me very well but I do know Jackson. When I first started, I asked for a list of every child who was sent to the Principal last year and while there were many, Jackson was on that list." Yes, I know. Jack knows the AP's office VERY WELL.
But I loved this about him. He said that he wanted to get to know those children and keep in eye on them. He told me "I've met with Jackson and I've seen him in his classroom and in the lunchroom and I can tell you that he is one of the most well-mannered and respectful kids I've met." Seriously, I had tears in my eyes when he was speaking of Jack. He said he questioned Jack and asked him to tell his story. Jack told him how C was hitting and punching him and then kicked him in his "private parts". Mr. W asked Jack what he was doing while C was hitting him and Jack said just blocking the blows and telling him to stop. He said that C confirmed this, as well. Mr. W then said to me "Mila, the other boy (they can't ever use his name even though I already know who it is) is much smaller than Jackson and Jack could have ...." I think he was searching for the right words to say and I said "I know, Jack could have pounded him into the ground!" And Mr. W said - "YES - Jack could have pounded him into the ground had he wanted to." He said he told Jack over and over that he was SO PROUD of him and the self-control (SELF-CONTROL - that has always been Jack's BIGGEST issue! He's never been violent, so he wouldn't try to hurt someone, but he usually ACTS without thinking but he showed SELF-CONTROL!) Mr. W said he wanted to get on the loud speaker and announce to the school just how proud of Jack he is!! But he can't do that. He just kept telling Jack that he's so proud of him and that he was going to call his parents just to let them know. He went on to tell me what a "cool kid" Jack is.
I'm so proud of Jackson! I want to run down the streets shouting for him myself! I've been thinking about what to do for him - he's been saving his money for an iPod and he's got a lot saved, I think it's time to go buy that for him!
Mr. W said that he showed great restraint but great maturity in the way he handled C.
Oh and he said that while he can't talk about what discipline that C will receive, I can trust him that they will be meeting with his parents and that the age appropriate action will be taken. I said I'm completely fine with that and I don't want to make a federal case out of this, but I just want everyone to be treated fairly.
Can I just say that I LOVE LOVE LOVE our new AP. He seems really fair and like he genuinely cares for the students. I like that he is all about rewards as well as punishments. And he thinks outside of the box - our last AP was such a stickler for procedure that she seemed non-human, like a robot. It was highly frustrating but we dealt with it and we all showed her respect - but I can now happily say that she is GONE!!!
And it's times like these that make me SO SCARED of moving and leaving this school.
Most of you know that I didn't really "care" for our previous AP and while she and I were friendly with each other - we kind of butted heads on some things. Remember when she accused Jack of lying and I proved that he was telling the truth and then made her apologize to him? Yeah - that started our rift and well, it really never went away.So, imagine my surprise when school starts this year and I see she is no longer at our school. (She moved back to Chicago where she was from to be closer to family.) Anyway, we got a new AP who is a male and until today has only said two words to me. He seems friendly but very quiet.
After the incident yesterday, I emailed the Principal, the new AP and the teacher. I posted the email that I sent yesterday. Well, this morning the Principal emailed me first thing saying that the AP would be speaking with all children involved and appropriate action would be taken.
So I get a call a few minutes ago from the AP, Mr. W. He said he received my email and called Macy into his office this morning to tell her story. He said that she didn't tell him anything that she hadn't already told me. He said she didn't mention the pulling up the skirt part and he didn't want to press her on that issue in case it made her uncomfortable but he already knew about it from the teacher and me. She just told him about C calling her brother and sister names. She told him that he has always liked her and used to hug and kiss her in Kindergarten but he doesn't do that anymore.
Then he called in C and let him tell his side of the story. He confirmed everything Macy had already told him.
Then he called Jack in to tell his side of the story. The AP told me "I know you don't know me very well but I do know Jackson. When I first started, I asked for a list of every child who was sent to the Principal last year and while there were many, Jackson was on that list." Yes, I know. Jack knows the AP's office VERY WELL.
But I loved this about him. He said that he wanted to get to know those children and keep in eye on them. He told me "I've met with Jackson and I've seen him in his classroom and in the lunchroom and I can tell you that he is one of the most well-mannered and respectful kids I've met." Seriously, I had tears in my eyes when he was speaking of Jack. He said he questioned Jack and asked him to tell his story. Jack told him how C was hitting and punching him and then kicked him in his "private parts". Mr. W asked Jack what he was doing while C was hitting him and Jack said just blocking the blows and telling him to stop. He said that C confirmed this, as well. Mr. W then said to me "Mila, the other boy (they can't ever use his name even though I already know who it is) is much smaller than Jackson and Jack could have ...." I think he was searching for the right words to say and I said "I know, Jack could have pounded him into the ground!" And Mr. W said - "YES - Jack could have pounded him into the ground had he wanted to." He said he told Jack over and over that he was SO PROUD of him and the self-control (SELF-CONTROL - that has always been Jack's BIGGEST issue! He's never been violent, so he wouldn't try to hurt someone, but he usually ACTS without thinking but he showed SELF-CONTROL!) Mr. W said he wanted to get on the loud speaker and announce to the school just how proud of Jack he is!! But he can't do that. He just kept telling Jack that he's so proud of him and that he was going to call his parents just to let them know. He went on to tell me what a "cool kid" Jack is.I'm so proud of Jackson! I want to run down the streets shouting for him myself! I've been thinking about what to do for him - he's been saving his money for an iPod and he's got a lot saved, I think it's time to go buy that for him!
Mr. W said that he showed great restraint but great maturity in the way he handled C.
Oh and he said that while he can't talk about what discipline that C will receive, I can trust him that they will be meeting with his parents and that the age appropriate action will be taken. I said I'm completely fine with that and I don't want to make a federal case out of this, but I just want everyone to be treated fairly.
Can I just say that I LOVE LOVE LOVE our new AP. He seems really fair and like he genuinely cares for the students. I like that he is all about rewards as well as punishments. And he thinks outside of the box - our last AP was such a stickler for procedure that she seemed non-human, like a robot. It was highly frustrating but we dealt with it and we all showed her respect - but I can now happily say that she is GONE!!!
And it's times like these that make me SO SCARED of moving and leaving this school.
